Philophobia
by jojo07
Summary: Philophobia: the fear of falling in love. For Naruto, it's a fear that stops him from getting too close to anyone. But what if he attends these sessions with Hinata, his new therapist? But there are some unfortunate events in life so why did she have to fall for him, the one who can't love her back? AU.


Falling in love. He always heard of it, from his mom or dad. The way they looked at each other…the fear he always felt with it. He hears it from his best friend who tells him in a rather not so stoic manner how much he loves his girlfriend and the more Naruto thought about _love_ , having a _girlfriend_ , and just being in a _relationship_ brings out a wave of fear that he simply could not control. It happened when he was rather little when he stumbled upon a horrible fight between his mom and dad. They screamed at each other and all he can remember were the repeated words, " _I don't love you anymore! I'm leaving you!_ " He remembers crawling in a corner and crying big, fat tears because he thought his parents would leave him. It shook him to the core how horrible love can be and, for some reason, he grew a phobia towards it. The symptoms didn't show up until he started to push his parents away when he was around ten and cried in hysterics when a girl told him he'll marry her when he was in kinder.

Of course, his parents are better now and while he does love them, he keeps his distance. What if they do leave him? Naruto blinks and he feels his hands shake from the anxiety of that thought. He lives in solitude now and while most people feel pity for him, he doesn't. He likes not worrying about _love_ or being committed in a relationship. It's already hard trying to keep up with his one and only best friend Sasuke. Sometimes he even feels like pushing Sasuke away, of course that idiot never lets him.

He does go to sessions—shit he's late, he should start going—and while that somewhat helps his anxiety, his phobia hasn't gone away. His therapist has confronted him if he's been doing his exercises that he's recommended him to do but Naruto—if he is being honest with himself—hasn't done it. He simply hasn't. Every time he tried watching his parent's wedding video or a romantic movie, his body trembles and his head gets lightheaded. Nearly fainted once too. So, no, he hasn't done the exercise his therapist has asked for him to do but he can't really say that, right? A little lie won't hurt.

He grabs his coat and locks his door, rushing towards his car and racing towards the city. His therapist is an old man who's very open-minded and straight forward. He'll tell you the facts straight and how to help you the best you can. What he likes about his therapist is that he knows to keep his distance and tries not to establish a relationship beyond the therapist-patient. Naruto appreciates that very much. He parks inside the lot and rushes upstairs, slamming the door open. Despite being petrified of making relationships or any kind of bond, he still maintains his usual upbeat and eccentric persona.

"Ah, Uzumaki-san, how are you?" casually asks the receptionist as she types in his name in the computer. "I do have to tell you something though."

Naruto takes in a gasp of air before nodding. "I'm doing good, running late but I made it in time. What's up?"

"Hiashi-sama isn't here today." His eyes widen. "But his daughter, who is the other occupant of this office, can take your file."

"Sure but…"

"No worries Uzumaki-san," she smiles, "she knows about your circumstance. You can pass right on by. She's waiting for you."

"Arigatoo goziamasu."

He gulps down the knot in his throat and opens the door. Instead of Hiashi-oji-san sitting in his old worn out leather chair, it's a woman who sits there with a poise of sophistication and perfection. She straightens up and smiles, gesturing for him to sit on the sofa provided for him.

"Konbawa, Uzumaki-san, how are you doing today?"

"I-I'm alright."

She hums and smiles softly, hoping to ease his nerves. "I'm Hyuuga Hinata, your therapist's daughter. I hope you don't mind me taking over your case for just today. If you feel discomfort, please tell me."

"I, uh, not to be mean just don't try to…make any moves on me."

Her cheeks turned a shade of light pink and she gave him another soft smile. "I won't, Uzumaki-san. Now tell me, how have the exercises my otou-san has given you been working?"

He gave her a tight smile.

* * *

Hinata shakes his hand and bid him farewell before sitting down once more. She blew out breathe of air and pulled back her sweaty bangs with her hand. She knew about his case, something that she had only heard in her classes of psychology. Philophobia, the fear of falling in love. People with this phobia tend to avoid relationships that require commitment, as in Naruto's case avoiding his parents the best he can and trying to stay cope up in his office. Which, in this case, it's best for him since he's a writer. When she heard of Naruto's case through her father, she was curious of his behavior. Was this twenty year old man anti-social? But when she peered through her father's door window while he was in session with Naruto, she saw a bright, yellow-haired man talking exaggeratingly with wide gestures and an even wider smile. His bright eyes shone as he talked about his day.

There were times, of course, where she'll pass by and catch a glimpse of Naruto. Of his slouch posture and such sad, dark blue eyes as he remembered the source of his fear. Of the trembling hands and pale looking face as he described to her father the fear he'll always feel when his friend came over or that one time a girl of his old job came by to confess to him. He lives in a fear that everyone wishes to bask into: love. But she's determined to help him the best way she can. She's interested in his case and, if her father lets her and most certainly, with Naruto's permission, she'll love to help him.

After all, phobias can be cured.

* * *

"That's why you'll have to be careful from now on, Mr. Zan. The world can be a cruel place. And a place so cruel would gobble up people like you."

Naruto pauses his typing and grabs his phone. It's around seven in the afternoon and while Naruto isn't anti-social, he has very few people who knew his number. He picks it up and sighs out of relief when the caller ID read: Hiashi-oji-san.

"Yo, Hiashi-oji-san, how are you? Why are you calling me?"

"Anoo, actually Uzumaki-san it is Hinata. Sumimasen to bother so late but I'll like to have a word with you."

"Uh, sure." He leans back but saves his document before he forgets. "What's wrong? Is there something wrong with my files or…?"

"Nothing is wrong, Uzumaki-san, but there is one problem."

"Oh, okay. What's wrong?"

"You see, I don't know if you're aware that your progress has not bettered ever since you started to attend my otou-san's sessions."

He stays silent, not willing to admit that he's simply _too afraid_ to initiate any kind of progress.

"I understand to some degree the turmoil you must be going through and feel when we assign some kind of exercise for you. But we cannot help you if you can't help yourself."

He knew this. He knew this all too well. "I know. I—Sumimasen."

"Please don't apologize, Uzumaki-san." He can just hear her smile. "I actually called to reach out to you about this program I do with my clients."

"Oh?"

"It's a session that helps out my clients to ease out of their ordeal. I'll like to—with your permission of course—take over your file and put you under my program."

"What…what do you mean by your session?"

"Well, it's a session where I personally take my clients to locations that are related in a way to their ordeal. But, of course, I am sure they're not so close enough to trigger anything. I start off with little by little, for example showing pictures or demonstrating something they might have a hard time dealing with. From there, I'll write down your progress and I'll see when the session stops."

"How long would it take?" he asks with a quivering tone. The idea of confronting his fear gives him anxiety. But he knew that this might help him deal with his phobia better and, quite possibly, for it to disappear all together.

"As long as it takes for the patient. There are some who are still in session for over three years. Each person has their own pace and I'll be there every step of the way."

He pauses, holding his breath and contemplating about this idea. His eyes swell with tears at the idea of finally getting to be close to his parents without getting an anxiety attack. The idea of no longer being called abnormal gave him a bright light in his rather dark tunnel.

"Sure!" he exclaims, wiping the tears away. "I-I'll definitely start this. When do we start?"

"Tomorrow, if you can."

"Of course."

"Then we'll meet here at the office and we'll start right away. Thank you for your time, Uzumaki-san. Have a good night."

"You too." And he clicks. He smiles widely and throws his phone up and catches it with his hands.

"Maybe I can finally be normal again."


End file.
